As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
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