ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
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you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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