Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
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