Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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