Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
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As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
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I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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