with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
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