Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
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