Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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