I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.