so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
