I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
