I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
