doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
