I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
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