she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
You pole danced in your parka.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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