So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
That was an excessively violent trivia night
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
why does every cop we meet know your name?
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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