there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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