Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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