Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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