he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
