I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
