Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
