It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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