so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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