weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Randomize
