Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize