I only kidnapped one of them. chill
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Randomize
