My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize