i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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