i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
