Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
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