Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Randomize
