I'm laying in your front yard are you home
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
