i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
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