is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize
