so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
