This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
