just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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