we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize
