So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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