Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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