That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize
