Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
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