Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize