My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
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