Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
