I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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