And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize
