just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
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