she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
