We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
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